What Promotes Better Leadership?

How many leadership books have you read? I’ve read countless. How many seminars have you attended? I’ve lost track.

But I’ve concluded that the activity that promotes better leadership more than any other is working on ourselves within our family of origin: getting more neutral about the hot areas of family life, learning more about the family story as an adult, rather than believing the childlike version we learned when we were young, and getting connected with more people in the family.

For me, I’m the oldest daughter of an oldest daughter of a pastor. I have to manage my tendency to be bossy and my need to be good and have people like me. As I’ve been able to work on my overfunctioning, and learn to tolerate other people’s displeasure, I’ve become a better leader. Working on these issues within the family has more bang for the buck, in terms of the impact on the rest of life, than in any other arena. This work is never done. I’ve been at it for almost 15 years. The good news is there is always another opportunity to practice.

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